When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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