Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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