Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Randomize