Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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