haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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