Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
