Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
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