I cockslap morals
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
