ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
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He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
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