If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
