More tranny stories later!
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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