Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
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