i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
