Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Randomize
