My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
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