Why are handjobs necessary in class?
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
