Whod you bang
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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