He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
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i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
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I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
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