Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
