I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize