i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
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