I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
