I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Randomize