Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
19 Teachers Share the Funniest Items Brought to “Show and Tell”
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
23 Concerns People Have When They’re About To Have Sex With Someone New
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."