Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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