Porn is love you can see.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Randomize
