chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
