All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
it's like heaven, but drunker
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"