My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
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