woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
how drunk are you?
Several
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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