Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Every concussion has its silver lining
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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