Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Randomize
