White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
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