we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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