How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize