another moral hangover. fuck.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
