Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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