i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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