Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
