I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
