So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
