Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I made him laugh his dick is mine
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
