It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
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