Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching

  (586): View more from Michigan

  Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)

  (586): View more from Michigan

  It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie

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  (586): I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching (586): Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please) (586): It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie http://tfl.nu/o2c2
  Replies (6) Good night (779) Bad night (1133)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.

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  (301): Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome. http://tfl.nu/igis
  Replies (6) Good night (1388) Bad night (466)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.

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  (617): I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront. http://tfl.nu/9odf
  Replies (15) Good night (3693) Bad night (686)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man

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  (207): Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man http://tfl.nu/9o60
  Replies (43) Good night (6395) Bad night (997)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures

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  (404): best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures http://tfl.nu/m84y
  Replies (28) Good night (3594) Bad night (844)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.

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  (617): just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil. http://tfl.nu/drc4
  Replies (13) Good night (7501) Bad night (1376)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.

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  (978): I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING (617): you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me. http://tfl.nu/bj47
  Replies (33) Good night (8383) Bad night (1566)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..

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  (+61): i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history.. http://tfl.nu/iskw
  Replies (9) Good night (2134) Bad night (704)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.

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  (563): I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word. http://tfl.nu/iv5v
  Replies (9) Good night (895) Bad night (939)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.

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  (507): Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it. http://tfl.nu/8sjw
  Replies (7) Good night (1359) Bad night (372)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.

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  (610): I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA. http://tfl.nu/fhl1
  Replies (5) Good night (1108) Bad night (350)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  how did operation slutty penguin go?

  (619): View more from California

  pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter

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  (303): how did operation slutty penguin go? (619): pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter http://tfl.nu/uigh
  Replies (6) Good night (2674) Bad night (420)
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  (650): View more from California

  So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.

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  (650): So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer. http://tfl.nu/8gu5
  Replies (5) Good night (598) Bad night (296)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night

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  (303): I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night http://tfl.nu/koj1
  Replies (5) Good night (412) Bad night (262)
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  (212): View more from New York

  VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY

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  (212): VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY http://tfl.nu/jiho
  Replies (1) Good night (588) Bad night (226)

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