Walk of Shame today included voting.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I'm too high and old for this...
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
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