just come out here and I will go home with you...
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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