you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
