We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
