went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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