uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
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Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
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