So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
