so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
