i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
